The pandemic of 2020 created situations that were once unimaginable. The threat to our health continued through 2023, when the end of the federal COVID-19 public health emergency was declared. The devastation across the world left loved ones with permanent scars and our nation is still healing. This FAMA Center website continues to offer trustworthy online health resources especially for dealing with stress and anxiety from COVID and beyond. My philosophy is that all aspects of health are interrelated and include emotional health, mental health, physical health and spiritual health and although each need unique attention, each impact overall health and contribute to your wellbeing and quality of life. It is a strength to say, I am not okay and to ask for help from local social services, your health care provider, therapists, caring friends, helplines and hotlines. You are not alone. We all need extra support from time to time. Health Links  

Please feel free share your story of how you are coping or any information that can benefit other people like you by emailing info@famacenter.org  Writing is therapeutic and a great way to share our common human experiences.  Thank you for visiting and being mindful about your health. 

Create New Memories for the Holidays

Written by: Maria Ugarte-Ramos

Posted: November 23, 2015

The holidays are a wonderful time of year.  We have a chance to visit with family and travel is a major activity during this time.  Family reunions are great in so many ways.  They can be memorable, warm and rich, but can also be stressful. Loved ones may press our buttons and disagreements may be sparked. We may remember why we moved far away in the first place. If pleasant, the visit goes by fast. If not, it may feel dragged out.  Here are a few tips to keep things on a positive note:  recognize what presses your buttons, agree to disagree, going with the flow is much easier than against it, being angry takes a lot of energy so save your energy for the things you enjoy, accept the things you cannot change, talk about the good times, try to laugh (or cry) together, find time for yourself and give others space too. Above all, try to have a good time.  Soon, you will be on your way back home and you will have created new lasting memories. 

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Cleaning is Therapeutic

Written by: Maria Ugarte-Ramos

Posted: October 15, 2015

This fall, I tackled what has been an overwhelming project for years.  I cleaned my husband’s room aka the ‘Batcave’.  He is a collector and had accumulated so much that I could not reach corners in his room.  I decided to tackle this one small segment at a time. I discovered that there were many mini-projects within this huge project. Breaking it down into manageable chunks helped me through it. Weeks later, I can say it was well worth it.  I found old pictures, birth certificates, diplomas and nostalgic items that would tap our emotions.  Each item now rests in the right place of our home.  I was grateful that I did this now and realized I would not want to do this without my partner around because I could ask questions and we could fondly remember things together.  This opened up dialogue about our first date, our wedding and various vacations we took.  This cleaning period of our lives granted us a chance to remember cherished memories. I admit that I stirred things up for my husband taking him out of his comfort zone going through his things, but now he is glad it’s over.  He could not have done this by himself and once I realized this, it was okay since I enjoy organizing.  It was a give and take for both of us.   For me, this experience was therapeutic. 

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Make Time for Yourself

Written by: Maria Ugarte-Ramos

Posted: October 10, 2015

It is not easy to carve time for you when there are so many demands. Caregivers are often on adrenaline and sometimes we believe that we cannot stop or things will not be accomplished.  I am a results-oriented person who needs to meet my daily goals.  I need to keep going in order to finish things.  A sense of accomplishment makes me feel good.  Recently, I finished a lengthy project, I actually felt that I could take a little time and decided to come up with my top 10 favorite songs that touch my heart.  One morning, I found songs on YouTube that make me cry and it felt good to get in touch with my emotions as I had not given myself permission to feel anything due to daily demands and stretching myself thin as we often do.  Our immersion in day to day life and caregiver demands makes it easy to keep going.  This stopping of time was rich and now I have my top songs ready to listen whenever I feel stressed or simply as I perform my daily living duties. 

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Caregiving Takes Courage

Written by: Maria Ugarte-Ramos

Posted: September 17, 2015

My cousin is an amazing caregiver.  He responded to his Mom’s every need as none I have ever seen.  Most caregivers are females or perhaps we do not hear of men as caregivers.  When Jose noticed something was not right in his mom’s behavior, he immediately took her to the doctor. She had early signs of dementia and was also diagnosed with cancer. She had a rare salt deficiency issue that could not be easily remedied and she lost her hunger rapidly. Our bodies need daily nutrients and my aunt’s inability to eat properly brought on weakness to the point that she could not walk or barely talk.  Her wish was to return to her country of origin, Peru as this is where she would be laid to rest.  She had not seen her siblings for years.  Jose was brave to fly with her over a long 15-hour trip with a layover that must have seemed like 15 days.  She was very delicate.  Others would not have the courage to travel this way.  I know that I could not do it.  When she arrived into the sweet embrace of family after so long, her health actually improved.  My aunt is now cared for by numerous family members who surround her daily with love and meet all her needs.  In this case, the caregiver responded, the family responded and the patient responded.  Our actions have a ripple effect on others.  Love makes the ripples turn into waves.  The courage of a caregiver moves mountains.

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A Dedicated Son

Written by: Maria Ugarte-Ramos

Posted: September 17, 2015 

Jason took care of his mom at home for two years after she suffered a massive stroke.  He made sure that his mom had everything she needed day after day. Sure he needed some professional caregivers for a little bit of time as he was often sleep deprived, but mostly he did everything. He ensured the house was always clean and nutritious meals were always on the table.  Jason took his mom to all appointments and whenever she had to be in the hospital, he would stay by her side.  He encouraged her to speak even though aphasia had left her with the inability to express words.  Jason supported friends coming to visit and took her to church every Sunday. This meant that every time he left the house, he had to physically carry her in the wheelchair down several front steps and then up on the return.  I could see him strain his shoulders and catch his breath, but nothing would stop him from making sure every need of his mother was met.   He was a single man who dedicated himself to his mom after his father and brother died prematurely.  He would not have had it any other way.  This is a man who put everything in his own life aside to care for this very special woman, a former teacher and devout Christian, who raised him, taught many, touched many lives and deserved such tender care.  This is dedication.  This is love.  This is caregiving in its purest form. 

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Finding Acceptance 

Written by: Maria Ugarte-Ramos

Posted:  September 6, 2015

Whenever I would face a difficulty in life, my mother would say, “la vida es dificil” (“life is difficult”).  I often think about this phrase and reflect about what she must have been going through.  Life experiences are both beautiful and daunting and one thing is for sure, there is impermanence in everything.  Things change as do the seasons, the flow of life from birth to death, the learning process, one job to another. It makes much more sense to go with the flow.  It seems that as humans, we have expectations and often plan…the truth as we all know…. is that dreams can fall apart and the most perfect plan can go out the window in a split second.  What does all this mean?  Be kind to yourself and gentle with what happens that is beyond our control.  If we can be compassionate with ourselves, this helps us be compassionate with others.  Let us be mindful that our loved one that we are caring for had dreams, expectations and life plans.  There is much to be grateful for……the fact that we have the ability to care for, love and acknowledge others is a treasure to be cherished.  I realize that my mother was trying to tell me to be accepting of what life grants us….as difficult as it can be...these are the most valuable experiences we will ever have.